My cousin and I thought we were showing off some mad skills in a tube in the ocean. We sat on either side of the plastic circle and like a buoy we bobbled over the waves with ease. We were laughing and having fun until a huge wave crashed on us and we were sent rolling toward the shore. Stuck in the tube together, even after the ocean kicked our asses, we flopped onto the sand with our arms and legs intertwined in the hole of the tube like a doughnut oozing humans. I can assure you that there is nothing more attractive then two clumsy, pale people rolling around on top of each other trying to get up while stuck inside a cumbersome inflatable tube. Bathing suits askew, lots of unflattering white flesh showing, hair in our eyes. Her tit was practically in my mouth, my hand placement questionable on her and of course, tons of sand where sand should never be. Like a turtle flipped on his back on the beach and struggling to get up, we were a spectacle for a good five minutes. Sadly, our family just watched us from their beach chairs and didn’t even help us. I cant say I blame ‘em…we were pretty embarrassing. But I was still pissed at Adam for not coming to my rescue. I yelled across the beach to him and told him to have our drinks ready for when we got out of this mess. The only way I was drowning today would be in my Mai Tai.
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Collection of comic strips that illustrate the madness of my life - career, marriage, motherhood...me!
Click on any of the categories above or the "previous" link at the end of the page to see some moments that have stripped me of my sanity.